Am I Enough?
Moving Through the Fear of Rejection
“The biggest mistake we make is when we turn away from ourselves. When we reject or abandon who we are… We often strive to be enough for others, which is out of our control.
What will it take to be enough for ourselves?” Dr. Dixie Clark
I’ve been a therapist for over 40 years, and I regularly hear clients say the phrase, “I’m not enough.” It’s something that I hear myself saying as well at times.
And, because we carry this idea, we look to other people for validation that we are enough. Their acceptance becomes a lifeline for us. And, rejection feels like annihilation.
The fear of rejection runs deep in many people. It’s there because we have been rejected before. Maybe many times. And it hurts. So, we avoid it.
Sounds like a good idea, right?
Well, not so much if we want to live a full, authentic life.
The strategies we have for avoidance may be so subtle or automatic, we may not even be aware of what we’re doing.
Here’s a checklist to help you look at where this may be affecting your life.
What do you do to avoid being rejected, or to gain the approval of others? See if you relate to any of these:
• Carry ideas of perfection. Because if you make a mistake, they will reject you
• Be overly responsible so they need you
• Put others’ needs first so they won’t leave
• Not trusting love from others because they’re going to leave
• Try to fit in or be invisible so you won’t stand out. That way no one can reject you.
• Not be authentic or vulnerable, because they will leave if they know who you really are
• Reject others first
• Hold back from new opportunities because “they wouldn’t want me or like me”
When we have this fear, we do all that we can to protect ourselves.
Our idea is that it’s not safe to be authentic or vulnerable or seen, because people will leave if they know who we are.
Underneath this fear are beliefs we carry that cause us to expect rejection to happen.
Beliefs such as:
I’m not enough
I don’t belong
Everyone I love leaves me
So, it’s as if a part of us is just waiting and expecting this to happen. And then it gets reinforced over and over.
This starts when we are rejecting ourselves first. We are placing more value on other people’s opinions than our own self-worth.
We have sabotaged our love, our success, our moving forward out of our fear and need to control the outcome.
Loving ourselves and believing we’re enough is the antidote to the power the fear of rejection has over us.
How would our lives be different if we held the following beliefs?
I am enough…even if someone leaves me.
I am enough… even if I feel like I don’t fit in.
I am enough… even when I make a mistake.
I am enough… so I am safe to be me.
That is how I want to live my life…in this authentic way. How about you?
This class is about answering the question, “How can I be enough for myself?”
I invite you to find the answers to this question in a safe space with like-minded women.
This is a four week class that meets on Saturdays, September 9, 16, 23, 30 from 9:00 am-10:30 am Mountain time.
Earlybird cost is $225 if paid by September 2. $245 after that. Or, you can make two payments of $125.00
All sessions will be on Zoom and will be recorded.
Please read below for the description of each week’s class.
Each day invites us to begin anew. To be in our loving. To be fully present in our life as it is now….allowing and inviting Grace to be present.
Hi. I’m glad you’re checking out my new class, Am I Enough? Moving Through the Fear of Rejection. This idea we may have that “I’m not enough, so people will reject me at some point” is very, very common. So, if you find yourself experiencing this issue, you are not alone! It affects our lives in so many ways. But, it is possible to move beyond that. We can open to valuing who we are and what we have to offer. Will that keep rejection from happening? Of course not. It takes the sting out of it. We can hold the belief that we are enough, even if a particular person, group or situation isn’t right for us. We can move past the suffering and anxiety that the fear of rejection brings and open to loving ourselves no matter what.
I hope you can join us in this powerful class.
Awareness of your patterns and the times and places they are present. Letting go of judgment of self. Learning tools that help lift you out of the negativity and lower levels. Loving the parts of you that thought you were not enough.
Understanding the beliefs underneath the fear of rejection. What are your becauses? “I will be rejected because________” Upgrading these beliefs to ones that are empowering. Stepping into the energy of “I Am Enough.”
Integrating these new beliefs on all levels. Learning strategies to open to this new way of being. Checking for resistance from any part of you that is afraid to change their ways.
What is it you want that’s on a higher level? Freedom? Joy? Authenticity? Aligning all levels with what you want so that you are moving towards what’s truly important to you in life. Instead of letting fear and avoidance be your guide.
Check out our growing community
I have taken several of the classes in Dixie’s ‘Woman of Consequence’ series and they have helped me overcome barriers I didn’t even know were there, but were keeping me stuck. I am finally listening and trusting my own inner guidance, and doing what I really want to do!
Through this series, I noticed significant changes in my energy and thought processes. It’s like life got easier to process and handle, and the hard stuff didn’t seem as hard or take as long to move through. Things I feel I’ve been working on for years seemed not to be as heavy, and the things that needed to click in order to clear, did. I’m seeing the life I’d hoped I’d live with the balance and love I wanted to feel. The sweetness and joy of life are more present, and I’m finding my way to living a life of joy instead of just surviving. This class is transformational and life-altering! If you want to find your path to a life lived in joy and love, this is the way!
Dixie continues to inspire more inner reflection for me with each series of classes she does. Regardless of how much work one has done on themself, these classes are divinely designed to take you deeper into more self awareness. She creates loving support in a safe place with humor and and insight.
I’m addicted to the meditations and continued learning.